Now, before I go any further let me tell you that I used to get much more, well, angry, when this kind of thing happened. I used to bark out things like, "You need to be more careful!" or "Why weren't you paying attention?!?" I used to deal out big doses of shame when these kinds of things happened. But since then I've gotten a lot better - a lot more even-keeled - because I've realized that I'm also a milk-spiller. See, Owen was born into a family of milk-spillers.
After surveying the flood, Owen looked up at me and our eyes met. His
eyes were big, his mouth was open. We looked at each other for a short
time, then the initial panic of the moment wore off and I gave him a
little smirk and said, "That was a big one Owen." Amused and relieved
about my smile, he smiled also and said, "I'm sorry Daddy." My grace led
to his repentance.
But the truth was, I didn't need to forgive him in that moment. I'm sure he will make some other mistakes that are, well, more intentional, but my love for him and forgiveness of him isn't dependent on his behavior. Every mistake he makes, throughout his whole life whether it's past, present or future, is forgiven. He is my son. See, I didn't forgive him when he said "I'm sorry", I forgave him when he was born into my family. He is my son. The "sorry" wasn't for me, it was for him. He wanted, he needed, to let me know he recognized the mistake, that there was no need for discipline - no need for a teaching moment. He needed to let me know that he agrees with me about clean tables being better than messy ones. I knew he was sorry even before the milk spilled.
This is how it is with God too. I think often we are so busy riding the roller coaster of performance-based love and forgiveness that we don't realize God isn't even on the roller coaster - He is over by the river floating on an inner tube, motioning for us to join Him. He already rode that roller coaster. Now He is "finished".
See, God loves you. If you are His child there is literally nothing you can do about it. Grab an inner tube and plop yourself down in the river of grace. Your Father is waiting, with a smirk on His face.
But the truth was, I didn't need to forgive him in that moment. I'm sure he will make some other mistakes that are, well, more intentional, but my love for him and forgiveness of him isn't dependent on his behavior. Every mistake he makes, throughout his whole life whether it's past, present or future, is forgiven. He is my son. See, I didn't forgive him when he said "I'm sorry", I forgave him when he was born into my family. He is my son. The "sorry" wasn't for me, it was for him. He wanted, he needed, to let me know he recognized the mistake, that there was no need for discipline - no need for a teaching moment. He needed to let me know that he agrees with me about clean tables being better than messy ones. I knew he was sorry even before the milk spilled.
This is how it is with God too. I think often we are so busy riding the roller coaster of performance-based love and forgiveness that we don't realize God isn't even on the roller coaster - He is over by the river floating on an inner tube, motioning for us to join Him. He already rode that roller coaster. Now He is "finished".
See, God loves you. If you are His child there is literally nothing you can do about it. Grab an inner tube and plop yourself down in the river of grace. Your Father is waiting, with a smirk on His face.
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